What a way to start the year (I know there were other small tournaments before this but we're talking majors here.) Hats off to Roger Federer and Amelie Mauresmo for taking home the titles. Federer continues to dominate the men's field and Mauresmo finally comes through in the clutch shedding her unjust choker's label.  Here are the highlights and lowlights of the tournament.

For the Huddled Masses it was a great tournament. The Bryan Brothers finally broke through to capture their first Aussie open title after losing in the final the past couple of years. And wonders of wonders, we actually had a chance to see it live on TV after Henin-Hardenne pulled a "no mas" in the Women's Final. Ivan Ljubicic made it to the quarters before losing to the tour's newest star, Marcos Baghdatis. Max Mirnyi made it to the third round before being destroyed by Federer (although it was an entertaining match.) The Huddled Masses also welcomes its newest members. Fabrice Santoro, who is a joy to watch, makes it to the quarters of a Major for the first time in his career. The unseeded Polish pairing of Mariusz Frystenberg and Marcin Matkowski make it all the way to the doubles semis, beating the number five seeds Santoro and Nenad Zimonjic along the way.  Unfortunately, along with the good comes the bad.

If there is a bigger jerk on the tennis courts than Nicolas Kiefer, someone is going to have to point him out to me. He spent the entire tournament barking at the linespeople and trying to stare down his opponents. His antics in his quarterfinal match with Sebastien Grosjean were ridiculous. I've been known to throw my racket a time or two but never over the net, in the direction of my opponent, in the middle of a point. How the chair umpire did not at least call a let is beyond me. If someone knows the exact ruling on this please let me know. So Kiefer receives the harshest penalty in the history of Jerry Rules: A lifetime membership in the Huddled Masses Hall of Shame, a total lifetime banishment from the rankings and from ever being mentioned in this hallowed column again. Good riddance.

I've had little respect for Henin-Hardenne since the French Open a couple of years back. Remember the "hand wave" match with Serena Williams? Now, even that tiny iota of respect is completely gone. To quit in the final of a Slam is the ultimate in gutless (no pun intended.) Kim Clijsters had a legitimate reason to retire in her semifinal match against Mauresmo with torn ankle ligaments. But to quit with an upset stomach? Personally, I think her *ss was sore from the kicking she was getting from Mauresmo and she was looking for a way out. Her press conference was even more of a joke, stating that she felt "sorry for herself" for not being able to finish. She could have finished, she just didn't have the heart. But again, that's my opinion. She suffers the same fate as Kiefer, banished forever from the rankings and from being mentioned in this column by name again. Should she ever win a Major again she will be referred to simply as "the quitter."

Here's hoping that Clijsters makes a speedy recovery from her injury. Here's also to hoping that Martina Hingis continues her comeback up the rankings. Here's also to hoping that Marcos Baghdatis continues to show the incredible talent that he showed on his improbable run to the final. And finally may whatever designer who did the outfits for Karolina Sprem and Iveta Benesova continue on with the same, women's tennis has never looked so good.